Kind People Don’t Argue; People Who Argue Are Not Kind

In Lao Zi's classic text Dao De Jing it states, “Kind people don’t argue; people who argue are not kind.” (Photo courtesy Wikipedia Commons)

Greeting to you all, and welcome to today’s Ancient Tale of Wisdom. Hi, this is Grace Mann, back with you again to share another great storyline and it is titled: Kind People Don’t Argue; People Who Argue Are Not Kind

In the past, there was a gentleman who was acquainted with people who were eloquent and glib in their arguments. At that time, he believed it was their skill, and he didn’t give much thought about the relationship between eloquence, goodness and unrighteousness. Over time, this gentleman met a lot of other people who endured humiliation and they didn’t argue or fight back. It was then he came to realize the vast difference between these two types of people.

One day, when reading Lao Zi’s classic text Dao De Jing (Tao Te Ching), where it said, “Sages do things but not fight for things,” he again suddenly enlightened to the fact that clever talk and a conniving manner are not talents, and that humility is a higher realm of life.

In chapter 81 of Dao De Jing it states, “Kind people don’t argue; people who argue are not kind.” This chapter also goes on to say that: “Honest words may not be pleasant to listen to; and pleasant words may not be honest. Smart people may not have a wide vocabulary while those who are experienced and knowledgeable may not be smart.”

Being conscious of virtue, focuses value upon actions, not words. It is not necessary to debate higher truths every day. Because endless debates in actuality are just words, whereas, it is upright actions that reveal the true essence of a person. Every truth and righteous principle can only be realized through consistent and genuine cultivation of character.

Also, within his different scriptures, Confucius said “Gentlemen are slow of speech but quick in action.” And, “Gentlemen eat, but not eat their fill; they live, but seek not an easy life; they are resourceful, but cautious about their words.”

Both Confucius, Lao Zi and other great Masters, agree that whatever we do, whether we are cultivating our character or involved in social activity, we should work hard without resistance and pretension.

If we think about it carefully, a kind person with great abilities and skills doesn’t need to take a stance with others. He doesn’t have to prove his point. Even in the face of slander or personal attack, he can stand tall and be unsullied in his actions. Those who can endure offensiveness are people who also give silently and relentlessly without thought of reward or recognition. This type of person also has a mind that is detached from the hype of worldly success. Kind people don’t need flowery words and wily statements to win others’ praises.

On the contrary, those who constantly argue every day, don’t really have great wisdom, though they may appear to be skilful. A wise person will pause before he speaks.

In the nurturing of speech one should also avoid loud and empty talk, not criticize others in any way, but be sincere and kind to all. One should at all times avoid disagreements in front of another and in no way humiliate others. These are the traits of righteous and upright people.

So, it is clear that we should all talk less, and do more.

Thank you once again for joining us here at SOH Radio Network for Ancient Tales of Wisdom.

Until we next meet, laugh lots, be happy and may we all consciously learn to follow the traits of the wise.

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